
The wake of a boat affects the water long after the boat has passed.
Think about it.
A boat moves through the water, but behind it is a wake. The wake spreads outward. Other boats rise and fall because of it. People standing on the shore feel it. And depending on the size and speed of the boat, the effects can continue long after the boat has disappeared from sight.
Influence works the same way.
Wherever you go, you leave something behind.
Your words leave a wake.
Your attitude leaves a wake.
Your decisions leave a wake.
The way you treat people leaves a wake.
Your faith leaves a wake.
And here’s the strange thing about a wake:
The person driving the boat doesn’t experience it the way everybody behind them does.
You’re already moving forward.
You’re thinking about the next conversation.
The next decision.
The next meeting.
The next sermon.
The next problem.
The next thing that needs your attention.
But somebody behind you is still being affected by what you left behind.
That’s influence.
And eventually, your wake becomes your legacy.
Which makes me think about an old man sitting down to write a very short letter.
His name was John.
The Son of Thunder
When we first meet John, “gentle” probably isn’t the word that comes to mind.
Jesus actually gave James and John a nickname:
Boanerges — “Sons of Thunder.”
Mark 3:17
And John lived up to it.
He was intense.
Competitive.
Ambitious.
When he and James thought about Jesus’ coming Kingdom, they wanted the best seats.
“Let one of us sit at your right and the other at your left.”
They wanted position.
They wanted recognition.
They wanted power.
And when a Samaritan village refused to welcome Jesus, John had another idea.
“Lord, do you want us to call fire down from heaven to destroy them?”
That’s quite a leadership strategy.
Don’t like us?
We’ll burn your village down.
But Jesus rebuked them.
And John kept walking with Jesus.
That’s important.
Because decades later, John is still writing.
Only something has changed.
The thunder is still there.
But now it sounds different.
The Law of Proximity
You become like the one you stay close to.
John didn’t change because Jesus handed him a better leadership technique.
John changed because John stayed close to Jesus.
He was at the table.
He was at the cross.
He ran to the empty tomb.
He kept showing up.
He kept listening.
He kept watching.
He kept walking with Jesus.
And somewhere along the way, the man who wanted to call down fire started sounding like the One he had been following.
By the time we reach 3 John, listen to his language:
“The elder,
To my dear friend Gaius, whom I love in the truth.”
Love.
Truth.
Faithfulness.
Hospitality.
Encouragement.
These are the things occupying John’s mind now.
Before you worry about who you’re influencing, pay attention to who is influencing you.
Because proximity changes people.
John stayed close to Jesus long enough that the Son of Thunder began to sound like the Son of God.
The Law of Transformation
Jesus doesn’t destroy your personality. He redirects it.
I love this about John’s story.
Jesus didn’t turn John into someone else.
John was passionate before Jesus.
And John was passionate after Jesus.
John was bold before Jesus.
And John was bold after Jesus.
John had fire before Jesus.
And John still had fire after Jesus.
Read Revelation.
There’s plenty of thunder left.
Jesus didn’t remove John’s intensity.
He redeemed it.
The man who once wanted to destroy people became the man who couldn’t stop talking about loving people.
That’s transformation.
Sometimes we think following Jesus means becoming quieter, softer, less driven, less passionate.
Maybe not.
Maybe Jesus doesn’t want to take the fire out of you.
Maybe He wants to teach you where to aim it.
The Law of Restraint
Strength is measured by what you could do but choose not to do.
Young John wanted to call down fire.
Mature John learned that not every offense required a response.
Not every rejection required retaliation.
Not every disagreement required destruction.
That’s maturity.
Young leaders often want to prove they have power.
Mature leaders know when not to use it.
And this becomes especially interesting when we get to 3 John.
Because John tells us about a man named Diotrephes.
And apparently Diotrephes was a problem.
John writes:
“Diotrephes, who loves to be first, will not welcome us.”
There it is again.
Position.
Recognition.
Being first.
John knew something about that.
He had once wanted the seat beside Jesus.
Now he is watching another man build his life around being first.
Diotrephes spreads malicious nonsense.
He refuses to welcome believers.
He stops others from welcoming them.
He even puts people out of the church.
This is a man leaving a wake.
And it’s tearing people apart.
But notice John.
He doesn’t call down fire.
He doesn’t try to destroy Diotrephes.
He confronts the behavior.
He tells the truth.
But the Son of Thunder has learned restraint.
Maturity isn’t weakness. It’s strength under control.
The Law of Presence
Influence begins by showing up.
John learned this at the cross.
When Jesus was crucified, John was there.
When others had scattered, John stood near enough for Jesus to see him.
Near enough for Jesus to speak to him.
Near enough for Jesus to entrust something precious to him.
People remember who stayed.
When life falls apart, people don’t always remember your advice.
They don’t remember every sentence.
They don’t remember your five-point plan.
But they remember who showed up.
John showed up.
And Jesus noticed.
Sometimes the most powerful thing a leader can do is simply stay.
The Law of Trust
Responsibility follows reliability.
While hanging on the cross, Jesus looked at His mother.
Then He looked at John.
“Here is your mother.”
Think about that.
Jesus was entrusting the care of His mother to John.
Not to the loudest disciple.
Not to the disciple with the biggest dream.
Not to the disciple asking for the best seat.
To the one standing there.
John had become trustworthy.
And years later, in 3 John, that’s exactly what John celebrates in Gaius.
Faithfulness.
Reliability.
Someone John can trust to do what is right.
We spend a lot of time trying to become talented enough to be given greater responsibility.
Maybe we should spend more time becoming trustworthy enough.
The greatest responsibilities aren’t always given to the most talented person. They’re often given to the person who can be trusted.
The Law of Love
You cannot lead people well if you don’t learn to love people deeply.
This may be the greatest transformation in John’s life.
The guy who wanted to incinerate a Samaritan village becomes the apostle who keeps writing:
Love one another.
Love one another.
Love one another.
And by 3 John, he’s calling people:
“My dear friend.”
“Dear friend.”
“The friends.”
What happened to the Son of Thunder?
Nothing.
He’s still there.
But now the thunder sounds like love.
That’s what happens when Jesus gets hold of someone’s heart.
And maybe one of the greatest tests of our spiritual maturity isn’t how much Bible we know, how well we communicate, how large our influence becomes, or how many people follow us.
Maybe it’s much simpler.
Are we becoming easier to love—and better at loving?
Your leadership ceiling may not be your ability.
It may be your capacity to love difficult people.
The Law of Identity
Secure leaders don’t have to make everything about themselves.
John could have introduced himself in some impressive ways.
Apostle.
Eyewitness.
Inner-circle disciple.
Author.
Church leader.
The last surviving member of the Twelve.
The guy who outran Peter to the tomb.
Okay, maybe that last one wouldn’t fit on a business card.
But John doesn’t seem very interested in building his own brand.
In his Gospel, he repeatedly describes himself simply as:
“The disciple whom Jesus loved.”
That’s fascinating.
His deepest identity wasn’t what he accomplished for Jesus.
It was how deeply he knew Jesus loved him.
There’s tremendous freedom in that.
Because when you know who you are, you don’t need everyone else to know who you are.
Diotrephes “loves to be first.”
John knows he is loved.
Those produce two very different leaders.
And they leave two very different wakes.
The Law of Witness
Your greatest influence comes from what you have experienced, not merely what you have learned.
John had been there.
He had heard Jesus.
Seen Jesus.
Touched Jesus.
Watched Jesus heal.
Watched Jesus suffer.
Watched Jesus die.
Walked into the empty tomb.
John wasn’t passing along a theory.
He was bearing witness.
That’s why he writes in 1 John:
We heard Him.
We saw Him.
We touched Him.
And decades later, he’s still telling people what he experienced.
Information can impress people.
Experience gives weight to your words.
The most powerful parts of your story are often the places where you can say:
I was there.
I watched God work.
I experienced His grace.
I know what He did in me.
The Law of the Long View
Great leaders think beyond their lifetime.
Young John asked:
“Where is my seat?”
Old John is thinking:
“What am I leaving behind?”
That’s quite a journey.
He went from wanting a prominent place in Christ’s Kingdom to seeing a vision of a Kingdom that would outlast every earthly empire.
His horizon expanded.
His life became less about where he sat and more about what remained after he was gone.
And here we are.
Almost two thousand years later.
Still reading John.
Still learning from John.
Still talking about what Jesus did in John.
That’s a wake.
The Law of Thunder
Maybe this is the law I love most.
Don’t lose your fire. Let Jesus mature it.
John started as a Son of Thunder.
And I don’t think he ever stopped being one.
The thunder just changed.
At first his thunder said:
Give me the seat.
Then:
Call down the fire.
But Jesus kept working on him.
And eventually the thunder said:
Love one another.
Walk in truth.
Be faithful.
Don’t imitate what is evil but what is good.
And finally:
Behold, I am making all things new.
John’s journey looks something like this:
He wanted POWER — “Give us the seats beside you.”
He wanted REVENGE — “Should we call down fire?”
He learned PRESENCE — He stayed at the cross.
He received RESPONSIBILITY — “Here is your mother.”
He became known for LOVE — “Beloved, let us love one another.”
And he finished with VISION — “Behold, I am making all things new.”
That’s transformation.
Ambition → submission → influence.
And maybe that’s why John’s final little letter matters so much.
3 John isn’t written by the young man who wanted everyone to know where he sat.
It’s written by an old man who has learned what really matters.
Truth.
Faithfulness.
Hospitality.
Love.
Character.
People.
And John gives us three lives to look at.
Gaius is leaving one kind of wake.
Diotrephes is leaving another.
Demetrius is leaving another.
Three men.
Three reputations.
Three wakes.
And eventually, what each man left behind became what people remembered about him.
Which brings us back to the boat.
You’re moving.
Every day.
Through your family.
Through your church.
Through your workplace.
Through conversations.
Through decisions.
Through people’s lives.
And behind you is a wake.
Somebody is experiencing what you leave behind.
So the question isn’t:
Am I influencing people?
You are.
The question is:
What kind of wake am I leaving?
Do people become stronger after being around me?
More encouraged?
More confident?
More loved?
More faithful?
Closer to Jesus?
Or am I leaving behind tension?
Fear?
Insecurity?
Confusion?
Hurt?
Division?
One day the boat disappears over the horizon.
But the water keeps moving.
That’s legacy.
And maybe the greatest lesson from the life of John is this:
Jesus didn’t take the thunder out of John.
He taught John how to thunder for the right things.
And two thousand years later—
we’re still feeling the wake.